Lou Reed and
Metallica – Lulu
Warner Brothers
www.warnerbros.com
Rating: F
Some things just
don’t go together, like hot sauce and ice cream,
battery acid and eyeballs, and sex toys and Mother
Teresa. Oh, I’m forgetting another obvious one,
Metallica and Lou Reed. I mean, Metallica and Lou
Reed: You’ve got to be kidding? Nope. Metallica
“helped” Lou Reed create the album Lulu that
is in homage to some sort of an odd opera or
something like that. Whatever it is, it’s a bad
idea – a really bad idea.
The last thing the
world needs is for Metallica to suddenly want to
make an upper high society artistic statement. Fans
of the band want Metallica to sing songs like “Seek
and Destroy” and “Enter Sandman,” not tippy toe
around the studio with Lou Reed singing that they
are ‘little girls.” It’s true, they sing that they
are little girls…WTF?
And Lou Reed, come on, Lou, you’re a legend. “Sweet
Jane,” “Heroin” and “Walk on the Wild Side” are your
claims to fame, man, not some weirdo opera about
some freaked out chick. The last stellar work you
did was back in 1989 when you released
New
York.
Remember your song
where that kid Pedro finds a book on magic and tries
to make himself disappear? Maybe you should find
that book and try to make this album do the same.
Lulu
is a real lulu
alright. This is pure, egotistical, snobbish, nose
in the air, artistic crapola that proves Lou Reed
has taken one too many puffs and Metallica have
completely forgotten where they came from. Hell,
it’s almost worth buying the damn thing just to hear
how bad it is.
Look for this one
coming soon to a discount music store near you. You
will find it filed right next to
Chinese Democracy.
By Jeb Wright
